Our story begins the summer of 2008, when Jason was visiting friends in Denmark and took a solo side trip for a long weekend in Sweden in search of the factory where hotties are made. Though he was overwhelmed by the beauty around him, he was far too introverted to reach out to anyone, and instead found himself awkwardly roaming around Stockholm by himself. Eventually he met several great…men, who invited him out to dinner and seemed exceptionally sweet. Despite being from the Bay Area, and with his complete lack of gaydar, it took him several days to realize that all the rainbow flags were up for a reason: he had arrived just in time for Europride celebrations that had taken over the city for the week.
With all the time he had to be introspective, he decided that, upon returning home, he would commit more time to finding the right woman to spend his life with, and less time working. He knew that going out to bars and such wouldn’t cut it, so he decided to try online dating. Thus, he spent some of his down time in Stockholm in an Internet café, doing research on dating sites: what people said they were looking for, how they set up their pictures, etc. First, he acted like a woman looking for a man in the Bay Area, and got a sense of what all of the competing male profiles were like. Next, he searched as a man looking for a woman, and ultimately found that everyone of both sexes liked being outdoors or in; dressing up or dressing down; had read the latest David Sedaris book, and listened to “This American Life.” If what these people wrote was true, someone must be lying, or else these people, with so much in common and such glossy pictures of themselves from five years prior, would be dating one another.
Jason had just read a book on evolutionary biology whose sole thesis was that those who are “different” are the most sexually successful, so he figured he’d be different in his profile. He sat down on the train out of Stockholm and wrote not about his most attractive qualities, but rather, a list of things that anyone who dated him would want to change: His car smelled of dog and always would; he is afraid of swimming for fear of sharks, even in swimming pools; his handwriting is too messy to read… Armed with that list, and some of the least flattering pictures of himself he could find, he put up his profile and flew back home with low expectations.
Selena had more experience in the online dating world. She cast a wide net by saying that she lived in San Francisco (rather than Napa), and posted pictures with a friend’s attractive golden retriever (rather than her two snaggle-toothed etiquette-challenged ancient mini-poodles). For over a year, her online search for the perfect man led her to a series of near-misses, which resulted in her naming each guy by the month they met. Having just disposed of June and July, she began August of 2008 letting her online service suggest who her next victim would be, and #1 on that list was the water phobic guy with the stinky car and poor penmanship. Her short opening salvo to Jason was the first one he saw when he returned home from his trip, and the two of them exchanged phone numbers the first day of their correspondence.
The following day, both had separate plans in West Marin: Selena was meeting her friend Amy at the Cowgirl Creamery in Pt. Reyes Station, and Jason was meeting his Labrador for a long hike and beach walk at Stinson Beach. Having low expectations allowed Jason and Selena to make informal plans to perhaps meet up in Marin after only one day of emailing, so Jason drove to the Cowgirl Creamery in his finest muddy sweat pants with wet dog in tow in the hopes that Selena might still be there.
Upon opening the car door, Josie the dog hopped right out, jogged over to an outdoor table where two well-dressed women were sipping champagne, and promptly sat on one of their feet. As Jason ran over to leash his dog, Selena, pinned down by dog anus, recognized the owner from his worst pictures online. With deft conversational skills lubricated by mid-day alcohol and the safety of one another's wingwomen, Selena and Jason commenced a conversation that goes on to this day.